Nights At The Clermont

About once a week or so, Jeremy and I have a CrunkFest where we get our drank on while hitting the trendy parts of town (East Atlanta Village, Little 5, Poncey Highlands, etc...). Well, one of our new favorite spots is the infamous Clermont Lounge, Atlanta's most-talked-about stripclub.

Now, I know what you're thinking when I say "stripclub", but I can guarantee you it's not the Clermont. No, the Clermont is where strippers go to die: most of the strippers there are generally over 50 years old, are fat, and if nothing else, a bit ugly. Also, despite having room for more of them, the club only has one strip pole, and it's not necessarily the center of attention there. There's also a dance floor, a DJ, and a sitting area that's not even in line-of-sight to the strippers. To further drive the point home, it should be noted that it's not uncommon for at least half of the patrons at the club to be straight women hanging out with their (boy)friends.

Anyway, all this said, we've been to the Clermont three times now, and it never fails to be a blast: Jeremy's been hit on by the only hot stripper, we've had Blondie (the most-famous stripper: a big, almost 60-year-old lesbian black woman with a blond wig) do her famous PBR beer can crush between her boobs (see above), we've met a somewhat famous band there (more on that later), Jeremy's paid for a private group strip tease by this 68-year-old stripper who looks like someone's grandma dressed as Little Bo Peep, and of course we've had a great time hanging out with our friends there.

But most fun of all was certainly our last visit, where we partook in karaoke night! Unlike my last experience at Metalsome where I also sang Cheap Trick's "Surrender", this time I could hear myself, and I had a blast! I got lots of high-fives and compliments afterwards, and it was easily the best time I've had doing karaoke! Jeremy did a duet on "Love Shack" with our friend Maria, and Maria by herself nailed some obscure song by Mariah Carey. The rest of our group opted out of singing, but the whole evening was a blast regardless.

Ultimately, the Clermont is a harmless, funny, and kitschy place that everyone should experience at least once, especially if it's their first time to town! Viva La Clermont!